Cultural and Gender Differences in Listening

Cultural Differences in Listening

Communication is viewed differently by every culture. Here are a few examples of cultural differences.
  • Some cultures view interruptions, corrections and direct questions rude while some cultures conclude from these actions that the listener is active in the conversation and is therefore more likely to have understood the message. 
  • Some countries begin their meetings with conversations not relevant to the event while others see this as a waste of time. This can be directly related to the different perspectives of time (North Americans are known to be very time and self-oriented.). 
  • Even simple words such as “yes” and “no” can be misinterpreted due to their different meanings in different parts of the world. 
  • Research found that U.S. white males respond most of the time nonverbally when listening attentively while U.S. black males respond most of the time with words (Bovée, 1995, p.631).  
It is important to consider these differences and others in cross-cultural communication.
Here are a few pointers to prevent misunderstandings:
  • Don’t assume you understand. An effective way to see you understood is to paraphrase what the speaker has said. If needed, he or she will correct you. If necessary, even take notes and review them with the speaker. 
  • Solve misunderstandings. Return to the source of confusion to completely eliminate all doubt on the subject. 
  • Ask for clarification. Don’t be shy to ask for the definition of a word you did not comprehend, as said before, words have different meanings in different contexts. 
  • Be prepared. Know the basics of your speaker’s culture. A basic knowledge of other cultures will be very useful in your daily life. 
  • Be patient. Time is the key in communication, especially with people from various backgrounds. 
  • Restrict from judgment. Open-mindedness is important in the business world since you might encounter situations where you must deal with people from other cultures. This also goes back to the notion of critical listening. 
  • Be aware of the speaker’s body language. It can reveal information about the speaker’s and his or her message. 
Bovée. (1995) chapter 19 p.631-632
Locker. (1989) p.474-476

For more information on general techniques to become a better listener please visit techniques to increase listening skills.

Here are ten strategies for improving cross-cultural communication.


Suggestion: If you would like to improve your skills in cross-cultural communication in the business world, the book "Guide to Cross-Cultural Communication" by Sana Reynolds and Deborah Valentine is a great tool!

For more information on cross-cultural communication please visit the New York New Jersey Public Health Training Center.
How to avoid cross-cultural misunderstandings by listening
There are three types of listening, content, critical and active (empathic) listening. Although it is important to know what they are it is even more useful to know how and when to apply them.

For more information visit the three types of listening page.

When dealing with people from different backgrounds, which is inevitable, a combination of critical and active listening is required. Critical listening because stereotypes and generalizations must be put aside to correctly evaluate the speaker’s information. You must be able to separate your personal opinion about what you think the speaker is trying to communicate from what the speaker is actually communicating. In other words, critical thinking refrains you from making assumptions that can be false.

Active listening is very important in these situations because of the nuances from one culture to another, even if the same language is spoken. For example, the Spanish spoken in Cuba is very different from the one spoken in Spain likewise for the English spoken in North America from the one spoken in Britain. Slangs and jargon can be very confusing from one background to another. That is why you must understand the speaker’s message beyond the words. When you participate in the conversation and ask questions when in doubt you are practicing active listening.

Gender Differences in Listening

 “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” is more than the cover of the American bestseller. It is a sentence that we have all heard or said at least once. It is no secret that men and women are different, but how does that manifest itself in communication and more precisely in listening.
When men and women listen, they do so for different reasons. They also seek different information from the speaker; men focus on the facts when women focus on “the mood of the communication” . Yet these differences might not be as important as we believe. Researchers Canary and Hause (1993) have concluded, after analyzing hundred of studies that gender differences in communication “are small and inconsistent; that is, about 1% of the variance”. This makes us question whether sex differences in listening are something we assume or something that is real.
It is no secret that women communicate at a greater extent; they do so because they feel the more information they share the more the other person understands. Yet, men see this more as a waste of time. Therefore, they might not carefully listen because they don’t perceive the message as important. Meanwhile, when men speak, they go straight to the point. This leaves women wanting more information because they feel that this will make them comprehend the situation better. This all goes back to the notion that genders listen for different information.
Regardless of why men and women don’t listen the same way, it is important to know what to do in these situations. Remember that these are general guidelines and that each individual is different.
For men:
  • Be patient. Women feel the need to express everything in order to provide you with the most information about the situation.
  • Be involved. Women often feel that men don’t care about what they are saying due to the lack of reaction.
  • Don’t assume. Don’t assume what they are saying is not important because the subject is not important to you. If she is taking the time to talk to you about it, she wants you to take the time to listen to her. 
For women:
  • Be realistic. You can’t expect people to always react the way you want them to. If their reaction frustrates you, don’t get mad simply say their reaction confuses you. 
  • Stay calm. There is no need to analyze everything the other sex says. There is not always a double-meaning to things. 
  • Say what you mean. There is no need to play games or go around the subject. Men can’t read your mind and it is not always so easy to deduct what you want to say from what you actually said. 
For both:
  • Establish ground rules. For example, before starting a serious subject, establish how much time you want to talk about it. This will prohibit certain preventable arguments. 
  • Show interest. Women and men are interested by different things. In the end, they both want the other to show a bit of enthusiasm in what they enjoy. 
For more information on general techniques to become a better listener please visit techniques to increase listening skills.

Just for fun
Find out how well you know your partner! Answer a few questions here.

References
Bovée, C. L. (1995). Business communication today (5th ed.). New York, NY : McGraw-Hill.

Canary, D. J. & Hause, K. S. (1993). Is there any reason to research sex differences in communication? Communication Quaterly, 41, 129-144.

Locker, K. O. (1989). Business and administrative communication. Homewood, IL : Irwin.

Guffey, M. E., Rhodes, K. & Rogin, P. (2006). Business communication: Process and product (3rd ed.). Toronto, On: Nelson Education.

Sargent, S. L. & Weaver III, J. B. (2003). Listening styles: Sex differences in perceptions of self and others. International Journal of Listening, 17, p2-18.